Martha Ruske, MFT
Recovery Life Coaching
Bookstore
I read a lot. That's one thing that probably contributed to my becoming a librarian, as well as a therapist and coach. When I'm interested in a subject I tend to read everything I can about it.
Sometimes I'll check books out of the library and then buy them if they are "keepers." Other times I'll just jump in and buy.
I've picked out the following books for various reasons. I'll give you a good description of them so you can see why. If you click on the title you'll be transported to Amazon.com, in most cases, where you can read other descriptions and reviews. You can purchase from Amazon if you wish.
Book Categories
These are authors that are discussing long-term recovery, or the later stages of recovery. There aren't that many of them because most alcoholism literature discusses active addiction and how to get and stay sober.
Awakening in Time: the Journey from Codependence to Co-creation, by Jacquelyn Small (1991)
Codependence – the "relationship addiction" - is a crisis of the spirit and is at the root of all addictions. She also sees codependence as unconscious living. Small describes the stages of recovery in terms of the chakras, or energy centers. Stage One recovery (healing the addictions) and Stage Two (adult child and codependence healing) need to happen before the spiritual work of Stage Three. She synthesizes concepts from mainstream psychology, Jungian thought, transpersonal psychology, metaphysics, Eastern and Western mysticism, and Twelve Step.
Beyond Codependency, and Getting Better All the Time, by Melody Beattie (1989)
Beattie wrote this book for people recovering from codependency, chemical dependency, and adult children issues. Her book Codependent no more was about beginning recovery; this book goes deeper into ongoing recovery. She covers relapse, family of origin issues, shame, affirming yourself, and improving relationships in an inspirational and readable format. Each chapter ends with suggested activities and titles of articles and books she has drawn from. This is a very useful handbook- it can be reassuring to find descriptions of what you're actually going through, with suggestions on what to do about it.
Beyond the Twelve Steps, by Lynn Grabhorn (1992)
Grabhorn says that we can dutifully work the 12 steps, but we continue to feel alone, or that something is missing, because we think it's impossible to stay in conscious contact with a Higher Power on a continual basis. She challenges this belief by asking us to wake up and realize that we are far more than we think we are, that our Higher Power is within us, not "out there." Her book gives principles which go beyond the 12 steps. It's hard to give a concise description of this book because it's so conversational in tone, and it conveys the excitement that the author is feeling as she writes her material.
Getting Beyond Sobriety: Clinical Approaches to Long-Term Recovery, by Michael Craig Clemmens (1997)
Clemmens' information is based on his 20-year experience of working with people recovering from addictions. He has taken what he has seen in practice and has distilled the information into descriptions of stages of recovery, and the tasks that people are facing in each stage. He uses a Gestalt approach, and his book is geared more for clinicians and psychotherapists, but the material is pretty clear and readable.
The Real 13th Step: Discovering Confidence, Self-Reliance, and Independence Beyond the Twelve-Step Programs, by Tina B. Tessina (2001)
Tessina, a marriage and family therapist, believes that most recovery programs stop short of addressing the underlying emotional shortcoming of addiction, such as low self-esteem, lack of self-control, inability to establish intimacy, lack of motivation, and inhibited emotional expression. She thinks that some people in recovery can misinterpret their 12-step programs in damaging ways. She believes that we need to change the mental attitudes that perpetuate dependency – by ourselves, with a therapist, or peer group – in order to be truly autonomous. She provides a number of exercises in the book to help foster autonomy. I find much of what she has to say valuable, although the exercises are clunky and the organization of the book is somewhat confusing.
The Recovery Book, by Al J. Mooney, Arlene Eisenberg, and Howard Eisenberg (1992)
This is a really good handbook, written in an easy to read question and answer format. It starts with getting sober, and half of the book is devoted to getting through stage one recovery. But the rest of the book talks about longer-term recovery and the issues that people face. It has checklists so that you can assess your progress, and is packed with useful information.
Stage II Recovery: Life Beyond Addiction, by Earnie Larsen (1985)
This small book has a lot in it. Larsen stresses the importance of defining recovery so that you will know exactly where you want to go; otherwise, you will expect too little of yourself. Working on self-esteem is important so as to not sabotage the riches of a full recovery. He defines certain self-defeating learned behaviors, or roles, in relationships that we take on which need to be examined and changed. Finally, he describes the characteristics of an effective program in long-term recovery: concrete, practical, focused, and consistent.
back to top | Additional Recovery Perspectives | General Well-Being
Additional Recovery Perspectives
I'm always interested in what other people are saying and writing about addictions. The following are idea books or philosophical stances that provoke thought about addiction and recovery. Take in what seems useful to you.
Addiction and Grace, by Gerald G. May (1988)
Addiction attaches desire to certain specific behaviors, things, or people. These objects of attachment then come to rule our lives. We can't eradicate our attachments through willpower alone. Rather, it is the acceptance of our incompleteness which allows us to welcome the flow of grace, and which allows us all to move toward more perfect life. May describes the psychological, neurological, and theological nature of addiction, and the grace and empowerment which overcomes addiction.
Cool Water: Alcoholism, Mindfulness, and Ordinary Recovery, by William Alexander (1997)
Alexander applied his life-long interest in Zen Buddhism to his recovery from alcoholism, developing an approach called "Ordinary Recovery." The practice of mindfulness, or "keeping one's consciousness alive to the present reality," is at the heart of it. The author tells his story of recovery and interweaves his learnings/teachings. He considers recovery to be a process that ends. When recovery ends in a spiritual awakening, recovered life begins. "You will recover; but you will never be cured."
Fat is Not Your Fate: Outsmart Your Genes and Lose the Weight Forever, by Susan Mitchell and Catherine Christie (2004)
Written by two registered dieticians, this book lists food plans for 6 phenotypes that are linked to weight gain: addiction, high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, emotional eating, and hormonal. It starts with a questionnaire to assess your phenotypes (dealing with your heredity and your personal risk factors.) The food plans are clearly explained and easy to start without a lot of fuss. I have personally found the Addiction food plan to be extremely effective. (One caveat: it recommends some caffeine, which other hypoglycemic diets caution against.)
Healing the Addictive Mind, by Lee Jampolsky (1991)
The author is a therapist and is in recovery himself. He believes the roots of addiction can be seen in our search for happiness in something outside of ourselves: e.g. money, food, a specific outcome, someone else's behavior. He describes addiction in terms of the "addictive thought system": fear, living in the past or the future, judgment, and a belief in scarcity. He offers a "love-based thought system" based on teachings from A Course in Miracles.
Many Roads, One Journey: Moving Beyond the Twelve Steps, by Charlotte Davis Kasl (1992)
This book is a thoughtful and thorough analysis of the various programs that many people use to get and stay sober: AA, Women For Sobriety, Secular Organization for Sobriety, Rational Recovery, and aversion therapy. Her approach is interesting because she challenges the prevailing patriarchal-capitalist viewpoints and makes a case for women and minorities needing different approaches. She takes a holistic view of recovery and discusses physical aspects of recovery that often get overlooked that can be a component of relapse. She offers her own 16-step model for discovery and empowerment.
Overcoming Addictions: The Spiritual Solution, by Deepak Chopra (1997)
Chopra does not believe that a fear-based approach to addiction is successful over an extended period of time. Instead, he proposes reawakening the awareness of perfection that always resides in us. He discusses various addictions and treatment approaches according to Ayurveda, and has a section on restoring balance through meditation, exercise, breathing, diet, and joy.
The Spiritual Path to Weight Loss; Praising God By Living a Healthy Life, by Gregory L. Jantz (1998)
"The antidote to dieting…is to live a truly authentic, balanced, healthy life as a person who is growing into the individual God created you to be." This is an interesting little book, where the author talks about the relationship between body, mind, and soul, and the integration of the three, which allows us to chart a course for true weight loss and a healthier life, both physically and spiritually. His perspective is Christian, but that doesn't get in the way too much, in case you are not Christian. Mostly it is a spiritual approach not specific to any religion.
back to top | Long-Term Recovery | General Well-Being
ChiRunning: A Revolutionary Approach to Effortless, Injury-Free Running, by Danny Dreyer with Katherine Dreyer (2004)
I am not a runner, but I took a class from Danny Dreyer because I love his approach. (He has also written ChiWalking since I took my class.) This book is about reeducating ourselves "to move in the ways we were designed to move" – with ease, instead of with stress and tension. It will help you improve your running form, but it will also help you increase your overall health and well-being, and help you learn to be more centered and mindful in your life. "It's about having a focused and energetic relationship with your body."
Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui, by Karen Kingston (1999)
Clutter accumulates when energy stagnates and, likewise, energy stagnates when clutter accumulates. The clutter begins as a symptom of what is happening with you in your life and then becomes part of the problem. This book helps you understand your part in creating clutter, and gives guidelines on how to clear it. One chapter explains the Feng Shui bagua, which is a grid that reveals how the different areas of any building you occupy are connected to specific aspects of your life.
Coaching the Artist Within: Advice for Writers, Actors, Visual Artists, and Musicians from America’s Foremost Creativity Coach, by Eric Maisel (2005)
Maisel offers 12 self-coaching lessons to help artists and others deal with the challenges that creative life brings. He addresses life purpose, anxious self-talk, mental energy, centering, planning and other topics in an easy-to-read and easy-to-implement format. Although the book is designed for people in the arts, I’ve found his techniques to be useful for anyone who wants to create or accomplish something – and doesn’t that include most of us?
Energy Medicine, by Donna Eden with David Feinstein (1998)
Our bodies are a matrix of subtle energies. Bodies are designed to heal themselves, but every day we are confronted with things that systematically interfere with this natural capacity. This book shows you how to work with the electromagnetic and more subtle body energies. There is a lot of information here, but you can start applying some simple exercises and then go back and read more in-depth explanations if you want to.
The Energy of Money: A Spiritual Guide to Financial and Personal Fulfillment, by Maria Nemeth (1999)
This book will help you explore your relationship with money, but it goes well beyond what we would consider money issues. There are exercises to help determine your values, intentions, and goals. It discusses behaviors that take us out of authentic action: fear, perfectionism, addictions, spendaholism, workaholism, etc. There is a lot here, and it takes a while to go through the book, but many of the exercises are very useful.
Floral Acupuncture: Applying the Flower Essences of Dr. Bach to Acupuncture Sites, by Deborah Craydon and Warren Bellows (2005)
This book is fun to use because it is so simple and clear. It's a do-it-yourself guide to working on emotional states. A flower essence, applied to a specific acupuncture point, is the catalyst that stimulates the movement of chi, or life force, through the body. There are 38 flower essence descriptions, with a picture for each one showing the corresponding acupuncture point. You identify the emotional state that resonates with you (e.g. lack of confidence) and apply the essence (in this case “larch”) to a specific acu-point. The book explains the philosophy much better than I can in this short paragraph!
The Feeling Good Handbook, by David D. Burns (1999)
Burns is the author of Feeling good: the new mood therapy which has been a very successful self-help book for overcoming depression using cognitive therapy techniques. It's based on the idea that your thoughts and attitudes – not external events – create your moods. Burns discusses the common negative thoughts that we all have on occasion, and shows how to identify the distortions in them (e.g. "should" statements, mind-reading, all-or-none-thinking.) His concepts are easy to grasp and are essential, in my opinion, for good mental health. This handbook is an expanded edition, covering depression, anxiety, fears, phobias, and medications.
The Purpose of Your Life, by Carol Adrienne (1998)
This book pulls together the principles that are relevant on the search for one's path. Rather than taking the stance that you must "find" your purpose in the outer world, and then set goals to achieve it, Adrienne proposes the theory that we are immersed in a complex of personal energy patterns that magnetize purposeful people, places, and events into our lives. She discusses synchronicity, intention and nonattachment, intuition, our shadows and transforming obstacles.
Self-Esteem, by Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning (2000)
This is an excellent book about the Critic - that inner voice that undermines your self-esteem and keeps you from living as effectively as you could. It is clearly written and practical, providing tools for creating a healthy self-image.
Walking with God: how to achieve health, happiness, and fulfillment through spiritual healing, by James Keeley. (2006)
When we are facing difficulties our usual reaction is to try to change the circumstances that are upsetting us. It’s a form of resistance that keeps us from facing what we’re upset about and what we believe the situation means for us. The emotions of anger, sadness, and fear (and their variations of frustration, terror, overwhelm and depression) can indicate that we are in resistance. Keeley teaches how to break out of the cycle of separation through spiritual healing.
back to top | Long-Term Recovery | Additional Recovery Perspectives